Getting The Love You Want
Getting the Love You Want is a full weekend workshop experience based on the book of the same name by Harville Hendrix. While this workshop is delivered internationally by many different IMAGO therapists, Replenish Relationship workshops are led exclusively by Anna Gold and Tim Utting.
The workshop is designed to ‘meet’ couples where they are in their particular stage of relationship. It is renowned for its positive impact on any couple who wishes to enhance their connection, repair hurts and resentments, learn how to interrupt their core fight and change the pattern, or simply build a more meaningful relationship.
This engaging and powerful weekend is both experiential and educational in nature. It is commonly considered equivalent to 3-6 months of regular couples’ counselling. A main focus of the weekend is to teach couples Imago communication techniques, specifically the intentional dialogue, which is at the core of all IMAGO work. There are opportunities for participating with the leaders in order to model dialogue for the rest of the group, however this is entirely voluntary, and each couple can determine for themselves if they wish to do this. All couples have many opportunities to learn and practice within the safety and privacy of their own ‘couple-ship’.
Anna & Tim offer the Getting the Love You Want workshop approximately 4 times each year. These workshops are offered either in person or through a live virtual format which allows the opportunity for participants to join from many different locations. Each participant is provided with a workbook which is utilized throughout the workshop and contains helpful content and direction for continuing couples’ practice after the weekend is completed.
Receipts are issued for the dates of the workshop. Receipts may be submitted to extended health care plans which cover the services of a registered social worker (MSW, RSW). Receipts can also be issued as ‘communications consulting’ for those participants who are able to utilize consulting services for their independent businesses.
The workshop is held Friday evenings, Saturday and Sunday full days. Anna and Tim are happy to connect in advance of the workshop to answer any further questions participants may have before or after registering. Once a couple has registered, a letter is sent out which provides more specific details including specific timing, what to bring, what to expect, location details, etc….
If you would like to be added to the Replenish Relationships mailing list in order to receive more information, occasional blogs, relationship tips and updates for future events, please do so either by subscribing here or requesting to be added to our mailing list. We hope to see you at one of our workshops and look forward to supporting you in ‘getting the love you want’.
“The IMAGO Workshop with Anna & Tim transformed our commitment to marriage and provided the tools for the connection we’ve been struggling to find”.
– A. Smith
“A great starting point. Felt very respected, safe place, very useful tools and very realistic”.
– B. Jones
“The enthusiasm expressed by Anna & Tim is inspiring. Their genuine connection to each other demonstrates hope and happiness.”
– K & R. Roberts
“Anna & Tim were amazing. Very caring and patient, warm and inviting.”
“We learned skills and knowledge that are needed for life and in all relationships, but more importantly our love partnership.”
“Anna & Tim breathe life into the workshop with their openness, and the vulnerability of their relationship that they put on display.”
Getting The Love You Want FAQ’s
What is the difference between the workshop and therapy?
The GTLYW workshop is an intensive (though fun) workshop which takes up most of one full weekend. It is often considered equivalent to 3-6 months of regular couples’ therapy. Couples learn new and effective communication tools, and discover at a deeper level why conflict and disconnect occur and what to do about it. During this workshop the facilitators do not spend time with each couple helping them to navigate the uniqueness of their situation. The amount of information shared in the workshop cannot easily be offered in private therapy. In addition there is a profound positive impact which occurs through meeting other couples and understanding the universality of the challenges of being in a committed partnership.
Couples’ therapy can precede the workshop, come after the workshop (or neither or both). IMAGO therapy allows a couple to work privately with a certified IMAGO therapist in order to deepen their understanding of their unique dynamic and relationship. The therapist acts as a facilitator to support the couple in meaningful dialogue to ‘unpack’ their stories, and increase their compassion, understanding and empathy for one another. Typically couples therapy occurs over a period of time…weeks, months and sometimes even years.
Will we have to share what is private about our relationship? What brought us to the workshop?
The workshop is not a group therapy experience. While there is lots of evidence to support the value of group work, sharing of intimate information is not required. You will have the opportunity to share how you met, along with some of the positives about your connection. Participants regularly note that while they were anxious in anticipation of a ‘group’ experience, the value of learning alongside others far outweighed these concerns.
Should I/we read the book first?
Many people discover the workshop after having read the book, ‘Getting the love You Want’ written by Harville Hendrix & Helen Lakelly-Hunt. However most people have not read their work, nor is this necessary. The workshop distills the information from the book in a way that makes it easily accessible to all.
What is the cost of the workshop?
Please refer to the website workshop page to see the current fee of the workshop as it does vary. Typically it is around $900.00 CAD per couple which includes a workbook for each person.
Can we claim the payment for this workshop for our benefits?
Possibly! If you are covered for services by an MSW, RSW (registered Master of Social Work), then receipts can be issued as ‘couples’ counselling’. Alternatively, a receipt can be issued as communications consulting for participants who own their own businesses. Finally, social workers are designated health care professionals, and as such all counselling receipts can be submitted in Canada as health care receipts for tax filing purposes.
Do people do this workshop more than once?
Yes! We have known couples who have done this workshop many times together. Tim and Anna have done it a few times together as participants (not to mention running it dozens of times). There is something new to learn every time. In addition, our relationships change and evolve over time, so the material will feel new to you each time as you deepen your understanding and connection with one another.
If I have done this workshop with a different partner, does it make sense to do it again with my current partner?
Absolutely. Each relationship is unique. Two people, with two different backgrounds and stories means that the material will feel new and relevant for your new relationship. And you will learn more about yourself individually as well.
Is there a different or separate workshop for same sex partners? Or those who don’t identify as non-binary?
Some workshop presenters do offer same sex specific workshops. While Anna & Tim originally intended to do this, they have received feedback that all couples, regardless of orientation, identity and relationship partner, have felt welcome at their workshops. If you do wish to participate in a same sex specific workshop, you can visit Imago Relationships North America and search for these. There are some wonderful presenters offering these workshops listed there.
What is the ideal stage of relationship for taking this workshop?
The short answer is “any stage at all”. The longer answer is that depending on the stage of relationship you are in, you will likely absorb or relate to some parts of the material more than others. This workshop is designed to walk you through the various stages of relationship in order that you can understand where you are, and how to become increasingly relationally competent! So, whether you are six months into a relationship or have been together for 40+ years, you are welcome and will experience benefits.
Would this workshop be helpful for marriage/committed relationship preparation?
Definitely! One of the components of this workshop is learning the skill of dialogue. Dialogue allows for deeper and more productive communication. All committed relationships require the fundamental and often ignored skills of communication. You will leave this workshop understanding what has drawn you together, and how to navigate a healthy relationship moving forward. Having excellent communication skills will serve you well as you pursue a healthy and respectful life long love together.
My partner is very reluctant to attend with me, do you have any suggestions regarding how to encourage them?
We recognize that there is often one partner who is more keen than the other. We also know that as long as one person in a relationship is experiencing challenges, these need to be addressed. Often the reluctance to attend a workshop has to do with worry about privacy, and the anxiety about being in a ‘group’ setting. You will not have to share any of your relationship details in this workshop. This is a confidential and safe setting. Consider conveying to your partner that you have their back, that you won’t reveal anything that they do not want you to and that you will work privately in your own ‘coupleship’ unless, together, you agree that you do want to share something. Learning in a group setting is one of the most powerful ways to grow. It is wonderful to note the way in which the shared experience of participating in a group workshop helps others to feel ‘normal’ in their struggles, worries, patterns of behaviour etc…
Is there a minimum or maximum age?
People of all ages are welcome and find the workshop helpful in their relationships. We have had participants in their early 20s and in their 70s attending and all find the workshop welcoming and beneficial.
I am an atheist/I am religious. Does this workshop have a religious focus or intent?
This workshop is not religious in any way. The most spiritual piece of the workshop is the inherent understanding that we are all connected. Having said this, the workshop is also very compatible with any religious background. We are after all, all connected. There is no religious denial nor is there any religious discussion. This workshop is about how the two of you can work to connect within whichever belief system you hold, and in fact creates the safety within your coupleship to discuss similarities and differences in your beliefs.